Al-anon self test

I’ve decided to take the plunge. I’m visitng an al-anon meeting this Friday. Yes I have reservations (all previously listed) But I would be nice to talk to someone who understands.

I found this online. My answers are bolded.

Millions of people are affected by the excessive drinking of someone close. The following twenty questions are designed to help you decide whether or not you need Al-Anon:

1.Do you worry about how much someone else drinks? Yes

2.Do you have money problems because of someone else’s drinking?
no
3.Do you tell lies to cover up for someone else’s drinking?
Not anymore
4.Do you feel that if the drinker loved you, he or she would stop drinking, to please you?
Yes
5.Do you blame the drinker’s behavior on his or her companions?
No
6.Are plans frequently upset, or cancelled, or meals delayed because of the drinker? no

7.Do you make threats, such as, “If you don’t stop drinking, I’ll leave you”?yes

8.Do you secretly try to smell the drinker’s breath? yes

9.Are you afraid to upset someone for fear it will set off a drinking bout? yes

10.Have you been hurt or embarrassed by a drinker’s behavior?
yes
11.Are holidays and gatherings spoiled because of drinking?
yes
12.Have you considered calling the police for help in fear of abuse?
no
13.Do you search for hidden alcohol?
yes
14.Do you often ride in a car with a driver who has been drinking?
no
15.Have you refused social invitations out of fear or anxiety?
yes
16.Do you sometimes feel like a failure when you think of the lengths you have gone to control the drinker? yes

17.Do you think that, if the drinker stopped drinking, your other problems would be solved?yes

18.Do you ever threaten to hurt yourself to scare the drinker?
no
19.Do you feel angry, confused or depressed most of the time?
yes
20.Do you feel there is no one who understands your problems?
yes
If you have answered ‘yes’ to three or more of these questions, Al-Anon or Alateen may help.

3 or more. Hah. I’m up to 13 yeses. 13 out of 20. In previous years it would have been 15 or more. But it’s pretty sad that I can answer yes to over half of the questions

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